The One with the Thumb

It’s been about 4 and ½ years since I blogged! And, by “blog” I mean, shared 2 posts with the world 4 and ½ years ago. Clearly I’m very good at sticking with things I start…

Well, with baby on the way and modified bed rest ordered by my (wonderful) doctor, I have kind of run out of things to do… “Modified bed rest” – basically means take it easy. I can still work (since I can sit the majority of the day as a hospital pharmacist), I can still do normal activities of daily living (shower, make food, walk around the house a little, etc.), I can drive, I can go run some errands if necessary (well maybe, that last one is a liberty I take, but I promise I don’t push it!).  

Really, my list of things I cannot do is shorter, so far. I canNOT work out, at all, zero! No taking walks, no jogging (who wants to do that anyway), no jumping jacks, sit-ups, and definitely no CrossFit. This has been a really tough adjustment for me, and for David. We started CrossFit Feburary 4, 2013 (yes, I just went through all my tweets and instagram posts to find that day I posted my 4:57 am alarm clock picture). So since 2/4/13 CrossFit has been a part of our lives basically 5 days a week. When David and I were living in Anderson the drive to and from CrossFit at 5:00 am was some of the sweetest time in our marriage. I could go on and on about CrossFit, and I probably will, in a later post, but even though there really is no point to this blog, or this specific post, CrossFit is not the point. Regardless, having to stop CrossFit at 30 weeks pregnant has been tough – I miss the adrenaline, the sweat, the accomplishments, the community and camaraderie. And I know my husband misses having someone get up with him at 4:35 am. It’s a lot harder to keep going when your spouse is snoozing away in bed next to you while your alarm is sounding off.

I’m super thankful that I was able to keep working out as long as I did. I know it made a huge difference in how I felt during my pregnancy, and definitely helped keep away some of the extra lbs that can easily accumulate during this stage in life. I really wanted to be able to say I did CrossFit until the very end – but I have recognized that as a pride issue. My doctor spelled it out for me when I was told I had to quit, “You are no longer Amanda; you are now an incubator.”

So, here I was at 30 weeks pregnant being told I was no longer Amanda. Basically, I was “Mom.” I was not mentally prepared for that. I knew changes were coming and in about 10 weeks I would have to somehow become “Mom” but I thought I still had 2 and 1/2 more months to be selfish Amanda just casually growing our baby inside me. Reality check!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I have or will lose my identity. I realize I am still “Amanda” and that was the doctor’s extreme way of saying, take care of baby now above yourself – but at only ¾ of the way through my pregnancy, I just wasn’t ready to hear that it was time to slow down. That’s when “modified bed rest” was ordered.

So, when I get home from work and on my days off, I’m not really doing much. This has been difficult for me because I am a “goer” and a “doer.” If at home I’m usually running all over the house doing chores, constantly trying to keep up with the cleaning (believe me, I KNOW this will all get worse/harder when baby comes) and tidying. Now, I have to sit on the couch or lie down and “take it easy.” I have been reading my Bible (I’m attempting to read through the Bible in 2016, so far I’m right on track), reading other books, watching TV, writing thank you notes, trying to pick out baby names, getting paperwork done for maternity leave…. And that’s about it. I scroll through Facebook and Instagram more times than I’d like to admit – but really, there’s only so much you can do at home!

I cannot say enough good things about my friends and family during this time. Great friends have offered to come clean the house for me since I shouldn’t be doing that now (and probably because they know how neurotic I am about having my house clean). My parents came and stayed with me while David was away – they cooked, they shopped, they did the nursery – mom pulled everything out of the closets into neat piles for me to easily go through – and, as if that wasn’t enough, dad cleaned the whole house before they left, down to the baseboards. I know the transition hasn’t been easy for David either – he is definitely an equal (if not more) contributor to the house chores and duties, so I understand having to pick up my half isn’t fun. He is definitely in support of keeping baby inside of me right now, so he has been such a blessing picking up my slack. I’m so thankful to have him as my lifelong partner – we make a great team.

I make no blog promises, but I’m hoping to continue to post. It’s therapeutic – and let’s be honest, it gives me something to do!